


steps

by starrylitme



Category: Dangan Ronpa, Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Another Episode
Genre: A Komaeda staple, Almost Confessions, Also it's kinda written as if it were a possible FTE just a bit more convoluted, Freeform, Implied/Referenced Abuse, M/M, Past Relationship(s), alluded to anyway, mild though, wahoo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-30
Updated: 2014-08-30
Packaged: 2018-02-15 08:39:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2222622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrylitme/pseuds/starrylitme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Come on,” Naegi says, gesturing with his shoulder. He can’t ignore how Servant’s eyes light up, and tries to smile even if it’s a miserable uneasy curve on his face. “Let’s spend some time together.”</p>
<p>(A snippet character piece into what I assume the relationship between Naegi and Servant will be like. I'm probably going to be so wrong.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	steps

**Author's Note:**

> Written before DR:AE was even released because I'm curious like hell over "Servant" and whether or not he's actually Komaeda *which he is in this fic* and have no sense of patience to wait until canon finally gives me my Komaegi dynamic.
> 
> I still want canon Komaegi dynamic, Spike Chunsoft. I'll never forgive you if I don't get it.

“Servant-kun,” Even the honorific doesn’t stop Naegi from wincing as he calls the other. Somehow it sounds _worse_ —he thinks. Like he’s still somehow contributing to the mistreatment the other often receives, which the idea of that makes him sick to his stomach.

Still, Servant turns back to him, smiling without a care, like Naegi hasn’t done anything wrong. Because, after all, wasn’t that what his name was? When Naegi asked for it, ‘Servant’ was what he got. _You don’t need to know anything other than that, Naegi-san._

“Naegi-san,” Despite the growing frost on his back, Naegi jerked up alert and standing erect. Servant, on the other hand, was still as easygoing as ever as he cheerily asked, “What is it?”

Naegi’s mouth is dry, the words gone from his plans, and he hesitated. Stared as Servant waited patiently for his already dead response, and...twirled the chain around his fingers, the metal making an uncomfortable rattle that unnerved him further.

Even though Servant wears that leash so openly, he still draws so much attention to it, like he’s actually self-conscious about the piece. Except that it _could_ be an innocent character tic, like how Kirigiri tends to brush back her hair—even though Servant happens to _also_ share a similar habit of twirling his wild white curls around his fingers. Both are done with the same ease though, so it really shouldn’t be that noticeable in theory...

_Except..._

“Come on,” Naegi says, gesturing with his shoulder. He can’t ignore how Servant’s eyes light up, and tries to smile even if it’s a miserable uneasy curve on his face. “Let’s spend some time together.”

* * *

Servant doesn’t talk as they walk together even though he’s buzzing with excitement. It’s no secret, Naegi thinks, that for some reason he’s one of the few people Servant has an opinion of that separates him from others that he otherwise thoughtlessly obeys and politely, distantly interacts with. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t have a sneaking suspicion as to why.

From the start, Servant’s always been praising him. For his optimism, his kindness—his... _hope_ , a word that Servant strokes lovingly with his voice. Servant looks at him sometimes with that same kind of reverence, and Naegi understands, really... But he’s still unnerved.

Even though this _special admiration_ is one of the many reasons Naegi deigns Servant safe to be around even when the others are still so reasonably suspicious.

He’s always been too trusting, as both Kirigiri and Togami have told him countless times... Even though Togami more like sneers this trait of his like it’s some kind of fatal disease. But Naegi’s never saw that need to change that about himself, not even when his trust was tested and especially not when it had even been shattered. It’s too _necessary_ , he ultimately thinks, and he really believes trusting others is what got him this far. It’s also what _saved_ them, in some cases.

Naegi doesn’t doubt that his faith in others will continue to do so. He also wants so badly to believe that for Servant, it’ll hopefully make the same kind of breakthrough. He’s still not sure what exactly he’s getting into, true, but he still wants...

“Is something wrong, Naegi-san?” Servant’s curious question snaps him out of it, and Naegi jerks towards him, taking in those wide, concerned eyes and frown pulling at his lips. “You’re tightening your fists a bit too much. It might hurt at this rate.”

It did hurt, and Naegi loosens them with an anxious laugh. “Don’t worry about it. I... I was thinking.”

“Oh,” Servant doesn’t push. He’s never pushed. Naegi decidedly isn’t very grateful about that. But he does smile, calmly, and Naegi could never be too upset with him. “If you need me to take out your emotions on...”

Except when he said things like that. Things that actually made Naegi raise his voice. “Absolutely _not_. It’s _never_ okay to treat someone like that, Servant-kun.”

“Yes, but for me, it’s fine,” Servant does hesitate a bit more but ends up still sounding firm. “I’m use to it.”

Things like this actually break Naegi’s heart a little, and he shakes his head in response. Servant falters more, so Naegi takes his hand—the one that’s bare, revealing long, bony fingers that have always worried him for some reason—and gives a soft tug.

Servant’s face might have colored a bit, but that could have easily been his imagination. “You’re so kind, Naegi-san.”

_Huh?_ Naegi smiles a bit, and his voice is gentle. “It’s nothing. It’s not like you don’t deserve it.”

“No...” Then, Servant’s hand squeezes his, and his head shakes.

“Servant-kun...?”

“You don’t know...” Servant’s voice grew coarse, his head lowering even more. “You can’t say that so easily when you don’t know, Naegi-san. Don’t be so naïve. It’s dangerous to be like that—especially in a time like this...with someone like me...”

“What do you mean? You haven’t done anything wrong...” Then Servant looks at him finally, eyes cold and stoic and so different from the usual complacent Servant-kun he knows as he cuts Naegi off with shocking boldness.

“No, _you’re wrong_.”

“As far as I can tell and from what I’ve seen—no.” Naegi doesn’t back down no matter how startled he initially is. _This could be the real him. The real Servant-kun’s personality._ “You’ve given me no reason to doubt you, Servant-kun. You’ve never been a threat to me. You’re right that I don’t know you, but that’s because you’ve never told me anything. And I never even asked in the first place.”

Servant’s lips quiver, and Naegi can’t help but soften, sighing.

“If I ask, though...” he wonders aloud. “Would you answer me?”

Servant does hesitate, but still... “Yes. If you truly want to know.”

He does. But that Servant looks so uncomfortable stops him so Naegi just nods like he’s made his point. Servant still has that downcast expression, though, and there’s a familiar heaviness in his chest, that he’s sure is attuned to Servant in particularly hard times.

“Is there anything about you that you _want_ me to know?”

Servant doesn’t have an answer to that right away, and he wasn’t surprised. But his expression did tighten, troubled, and then... “I exist as a stepping stone, Naegi-kun.”

_You said that when we first met..._ Naegi thought, smiling and shaking his head, but then it hit him. _“Kun”...?_

“Whatever makes Naegi-kun shine with hope, I’ll do and go through without hesitation. If necessary, I’ll die for Naegi-kun.” Servant takes a deep breath, and then grips Naegi’s hand with his other one, still clad in that mitten. He squeezes with both hands, and Naegi catches the tremor going through his body. “But if you, Naegi-kun, get distracted by your concern for something as paltry as myself... It might cause problems. I don’t want that... But I appreciate it. That you insist on seeing something worthy in me could be a kind of hope so I can’t complain too much, but still... I don’t want it to get in the way of things.”

_Get in the way of things? Surely he’s not implying that caring for him is going to cause trouble? That doesn’t make any sense..._ “Servant-kun, what are you even saying?”

“I don’t want anything to happen to you, Naegi-kun.” He meets his gaze, steadily. With heart-stopping seriousness. “I’ll avoid that any way I can. Because I...” Servant stops, and Naegi perks up with wide eyes. Then Servant laughs, low and harsh. “I’m that impertinent. That’s all.”

_Is that really true?_ Naegi’s mouth shuts and he pulls his hand free.

“I should have known better...” He hears Servant muttering, but it’s barely a whisper. “It’s too much to ask for. Naegi-kun doesn’t _need_ this...”

“Servant-kun?”

“It’s nothing.” Servant tells him, empty-toned and blank. “It’s really nothing, Naegi-san.”

Naegi would protest but it’s the smile that stops him. It’s that empty smile Servant always wears, the complacent curve of his lips that was akin to a stitched smile on a doll. The one he always has when ‘serving’ others. Servant’s smile through and through.

_I always hated seeing this look on his face... And now that it’s actually directed towards me, I..._

“I...If you say so...” Naegi concedes, trying to keep his distaste off his face. “But if you want to say something, Servant-kun... I’m all ears.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”  It sounds so hollow still, and Naegi feels his spirit plummet further down. Servant’s just actively shutting him out at this point with the distant polite platitudes he’s accustomed to use. And Naegi feels almost helpless because in this state, Servant isn’t going to listen to him. “Thank you, Naegi-san.”

Naegi rubbed at the back of his neck, and Servant’s smile remained so he averted his gaze guiltily. “Servant-kun, I’m still...glad I got to know you a bit better.”

“Oh, I’m happy you’re happy,” Servant laughs brightly, and it’s an immediate relief. One that makes Naegi smile in spite of everything and turn sheepish. “Sadly though, I spend such carefree time with you any longer, Naegi-san. We do need to get back to business, after all.”

“Yes, that’s true,” Naegi sighs in agreement. He’s a bit torn but it can’t be helped. Their time together, for now, is over.

“Naegi-san, let’s get going.”

“Yes...”

But somehow, despite that smile, it does feel like things have gotten somewhat better between them. In the very least, Naegi did undoubtedly learn a few new things about the other, even when Servant never spoke about it directly.

_The Servant-kun from earlier... The one who called me ‘Naegi-kun’ rather than using ‘san’... Making all those promises... Voicing concerns like that... That must have not been ‘Servant-kun’._

_Someone who doesn’t involve himself too personally and acts like he’s furniture... That’s ‘Servant-kun’ as I know him. But this person is also human, and he has a name that isn’t ‘Servant’. Whoever that person was, I’m sure that I met them today._

_...That person who called me ‘Naegi-kun’..._


End file.
